You´re here one day, the next you´re not. We´ve all heard that one. Right?
In a distant corner of my mind
I somehow hoped to meet you someday
It will never happen now.
I´ve known you from around
I´ve felt your energy
The vibe that followed wherever you would go.
I could see you just passing by
I could see you partying out
I could catch just a glimpse of you from the corner of my eye
....when you´d most likely accidentally glance my way...
Always the same feeling.
I´ve never met you face to face
Introduced myself to you
But ´ve seen you around from such a young age.
I had a girly "what if" crush on you for a while.
Somehow we shared some interests and in the past years I´ve seen more of you.
I´ve seen you in unexpected places.
I don´t know anything about you.
I had no idea you had siblings.
Your parents never expected they would have to bury their child at the age of only twenty three.
My boyfriend is twenty three. Some of my cousins are twenty three.
You were so talented, so special.
I didn't know you personally.
But I felt it.
It´s not so strange.
You had so much in you
...anyone could see it
When you walked into a crowded room, everyone knew it.
When you´d walk out, everyone knew.
Not just because you were taller than most and stood out physically.
Sometimes you looked so lonely and distant.
But I think you were just in your own mindset.
You saw the world differently... Special...
You also didn't give a flying fuck most of the time.
You just lived.
You made friends
You probably cried
You were twenty three
You are gone
You are gone forever
I´ll never get to experience your company first hand
I can only listen to stories about you
I can only watch the souls you have personally touched
I can only sit here and selfishly cry because I´ll never talk to you.
My "what if" crush flew away.
Such a special being is now jumping and flipping around Heaven.
Looking down at everyone and rolling his eyes at the sappiness.
It´s how life goes people.
His job here was done.
We just need time to let it set in.
I can only imagine what others got from you.
If I, a mere pass by could gather so much from the outside.
Thank you for being alive.
Thank God for letting me sense such energy, if only in glimpses.